Everybody Hurts

It has been a long time since I rock 'n' rolled... well maybe not rock 'n' rolled exactly, but it's been a month since I last wrote anything here. That is quite a long time isn't it?

After the 'my computer's at the menders for ages' saga sometime near the end of last year I mused in these hallowed pages as to whether I might have, for want of a better term, lost the blogging habit. I'm beginning to think that I just might have done just that although I guess that the fact that this posting exists rather contradicts that thought. I've kept my Facebook page updated, but that's 'easier' to do isn't it? Maybe I don't have very much to say for myself at the moment? Perhaps I'm busier than I used to be? It's probably a bit of both... or maybe it's the post-tour crash that I didn't think was going to happen? On the surface at least I didn't think that it had effected me too much - I felt much more obviously upset by the catastrophic Upper Cut performance referred to in the last posting for example - but maybe I was just delaying the inevitable.

It's been very busy in Balcony Shirts, to such an extent that I've just worked 7 days in a row and am likely to be in there for a fair bit of this week too. There's nothing that puts 19 shows with The Stranglers into perspective quite like this sort of conversation :- 

'So d'you print t-shirts in here then?' 
'Yes, yes we do - we're a t-shirt printing shop.' 
'So can you print me one then?' 
'Well we can have a go. What would you like on it?' 
'I dunno - what do you think?'

As you might well imagine at that moment I've got more than a few ideas as to what they should have written on their chest, but I've been known to say something like 'well I'd have a picture of The Who (or whoever - it literally makes no difference who...) from sometime in the 1960s (or whenever - it literally makes no difference when...) but I doubt that's the sort of thing you'd like'. After that anything can happen.

Ruts DC have played a couple of shows since last we spoke - our performance at The Grand in Clitheroe was thought by us to be below par although thankfully many were they who assured us that it wasn't (it's better that it's that way round don't you think?) while a boisterous gig at The Zikenstock Festival near Lille in France saw much stage diving (they like that sort of thing out there!) and general jollity all round. Big Al Reed and The Blistering Buicks have been out and about too - highlights include a show at The White Swan in St. Albans which was curtailed after only 2 songs of the second set to allow those present to watch the Joshua / Klitschko boxing World title fight, while last weekend's 40th birthday party gig had your humble narrator musing to himself as to whether or not there might be some nice-looking young ladies present, then realising with some amusement that considering 40 years old to be 'young' meant that he / I am now officially 'old'. And it that all wasn't weird enough I saw Bob Dylan at The Bournemouth International Centre in (you've guessed it!) Bournemouth - his Bobness rarely if ever does what might be expected of him, and a set where he either played grand piano (often standing up) or wielded a straight mic stand in the slightly-disturbing manner of a not-very-good Rod Stewart tribute act without touching a guitar once wasn't necessarily what I for one would have predicted. Add to that the fact that the set mostly consisted of jazz standards (I believe he's just released an album of them) like 'Autumn Leaves' and 'That Old Black Magic' with the odd Bob classic thrown in here and there (often radically re-arranged - many didn't seem to recognise 'Tangled Up In Blue' until the title line, and I don't think many got 'Blowin' In The Wind' until it was all but over, if at all) and you had a show that more than a few audience members were none too happy with. Me? I loved it. Of course I did - he's a contrary old bugger, but all the better for it in my not-so-humble opinion.

I wouldn't mind ending up like that. Maybe I have ended up like that? Oh well - more whining self pity and non-crises again another time. Maybe even sometime soon...

'I'm back - in full attack...'

Friday 30th December at 4 pm, in seat 15D on British Airways flight number BA542 not long after take-off.

Well it's been a while since I've done this. Blogging I mean. I think that I've, for want of a better term, lost the habit. Time I got it back then.

Somewhere near the end of October - or was it the start of November? - my computer went wrong. I switched it on one night - to write a blog post if I remember correctly - and the screen remained defiantly white, albeit with a little question mark in the middle. A quick scout around the Internet (we've all got that on our phone these days haven't we? It's funny how you go to use it almost with out thinking isn't it?) revealed that it was likely to be a hard drive problem - so what was I to do? Hmm... I wonder if that computer repair shop down the road could sort it out for me?
Well it turned out that they could. Eventually. My new friend Terry phoned me after he'd had a look at it to tell that I did indeed need a new hard drive ('you have backed it up haven't you?' he asked somewhat ominously and clearly expecting the answer 'no' - yes, incredibly I had, and fairly recently too) and went on to tell me that being an 'old' (i.e. not 'new') MacBook there were limits to what could be achieved. 'How about a hybrid drive?' said he, rather more cheerily than he'd asked the previous question; he'd usually suggest a solid state drive but my ancient device wouldn't be able to cope with that but this would do the trick. Well it sounded like a good plan and was a lot less expensive than I was fearing so I gave him the go-ahead. 'No hurry' I replied when he asked when I needed the computer back. This may in retrospect have been a bit of a mistake.
After a week or so I called to see how things were going. My new mate Terry was still very much my new mate, and he lost little if any time in telling me that things were going well and that he should be able to have my computer back with me by, ooh, the end of next week. 'Oh that great' said I - it was only after I'd put the phone down that I realised that it would by then be over three weeks since I'd had the computer at home. I had several outstanding invoices to send (if you're a self-employed person like me then you'll know what I mean!) and had among other things an increasingly dim recollection of writing something called a 'blog'. I used to enjoy writing that, even if I was never really sure if anyone actually read it. I'd been able to update my Facebook page on my iPhone but writing anything more than a few words was just too fiddly. A snap decision saw your humble narrator purchase an iPad Mini as there were bills to pay online - it's amazing how much of that we all do online these days isn't it? - and anyway, I'd fancied an iPad for a while as it'd be handy for taking away on tour. I'm finding it less fiddly to use than a phone but trickier than a computer - oh well, I'm sure it'll be ok in the end.
In the meantime my afore-mentioned computer reappeared at the afore-mentioned shop. Hurrah! I rather nervously switched it on - it worked. Good! But wait a minute - something was different. Well, actually quite a lot was different. It was... well, it was like I remember it being when I first got it all those years ago. It's not how I remember it before it went wrong. Bugger! Oh hang on - I guess that means that I have to, I believe the term is, 'restore my last back up' from the external hard drive that I've got all this stuff sitting on. Well that should be simple enough shouldn't it? Well indeed it should, but after what felt like an age on the Internet I still could get the bloomin' thing to work. Terry - help!
'You probably need some iCloud settings updating, and maybe a few other bits and pieces looking at - drop it back into the shop and I'll sort it out for you' said my by-now-old mate Terry. Will do. Could I have it back a bit quicker than last time please?
Well it finally made it's way back to me just before Christmas and I'm pleased / relieved to say that it seems to working fine. Having spent years being clogged up to breaking point with far too much music in iTunes it's now less than half full - plenty of room for yet more music then - and it's good to have it back working at something faster than the proverbial snail's pace. I must still keep using the iPad though mustn't I? All's well that end's well - except that I tried to back it up last night (I thought that I'd better have a go!) and it wouldn't work. I'd better look up 'Time Machine Settings' or something like it when we get back hadn't I?

And it's been a while since I've done this too. Flown to a gig I mean. Ruts D.C. have a New Year's Eve gig at The Covo Club in Bologna. I think that the last time that I saw the original band was New Year's Eve 1981 at The Fulham Greyhound. That's 35 years ago. Doesn't time fly when you're having fun. Doesn't time fly anyway?
Since last we spoke here I've been gigging a fair bit, mostly with Big Al Reed and The Blistering Buicks as well as a Boxing Night bash at The Dolphin in Uxbridge with The Upper Cut which all but erased the memory of our last not-so-good gig there. I've also worked many-a day at Balcony Shirts which has maybe not been quite as busy as at the same time last year, and spent most of Christmas Day ill with food poisoning or something like it. Urgh! I've managed to have a couple of much-needed quiet days after Xmas before before Segs, Dave and myself got together yesterday for rehearsal - buoyed by the recent news that 'Music Must Destroy' was voted Album Of The Year in Vive Le Rock magazine ('I'd like to thank the academy' etc) we spent four very enjoyable hours running through material for tomorrow night's show. 
A lot of people don't seem to be sad to see the back of 2016. There do seem to have been rather a lot of celebrity deaths don't there? Incidentally I was very saddened to hear that Rick Parfitt left the building just before Christmas - one of the great rock 'n' roll rhythm guitarists, I met him once and he seemed to be a very nice chap. And I was never exactly the world's biggest George Michael fan, but you can't deny that the guy could certainly sing... and then there was that little matter of the vote to leave The E.U. (am I the only person that thinks that we won't actually leave?) and the truly astonishing sight of someone who appears to be a complete and utter lunatic being voted President Elect of The U.S.A.; it remains to be seen how we fare in 2017 but surely it can't be quite as crazy as 2016?

Anyway the screen says that we're 51 minutes away from Bologna and I've got 'The Liberal Politics Of Adolf Hitler' by John King to read. That's quite a title isn't it? I'm told by the author that the band are in it somewhere (that wasn't the only reason that I bought it, honest!) so I'd better get on with reading it hadn't I? 

Saturday 31st December at 11.24 am, in Room 354 of The Ramada Encore Hotel in Bologna

Ah, that's better. I sometimes wonder if there's anything in the World that a hot shower or indeed a hot bath won't fix. Not that I had anything in particular that needed fixing, but you know what I mean I think.
It's a lovely sunny morning here, so perhaps I should be out and about rather than languishing in a hotel room. Fair point - but since we have a very long day in prospect (we're due on stage at 12.30 am) a lazy morning might be a good idea.

I bet you thought that
I'd made those names up?!?

'Twas a splendid evening just gone - we were met at the airport by Mars and Angela (I first met Mars several years ago when as a member of The Valentines he was backing T.V. Smith on some British dates) who took us to our hotel for check-in then to The Jukebox Cafe for some food. The Cafe (which incidentally serves such delights as Punkcakes, Eggy Pop and, believe it or not, a Ruts Burger - if you're in Bologna then visit immediately!) is part of The Covo Club - with no table available for a while it was suggested that we had a walk around town which turned out to be an excellent idea. Whilst musicians are lucky enough to find themselves in all sorts of interesting places there's often very little time to see anything other than where you're playing and where you're staying so it was great to be able to see some of the local sights. Mars recalled seeing The Clash play an open air show in the Town Square in 1980 - Topper was late so they played the first few songs with the drummer from the support band Whirlwind on drums before giving a blistering performance. 'It changed my life' said he, looking visibly moved. I bet that it did. They changed mine too.
Outside the cafe a board advertises the (very) imminent appearance of 'U.K. Punk Legends' Ruts D.C.; the jukebox is blasting out early Stones singles and the food is going down very well as is the local beer and wine. We all pretty much ran out of steam around midnight - it had been a long day. A taxi was called but few if any other attendees were leaving - The Jukebox Cafe looks like a good place to be.
Meanwhile I've got Creedence Clearwater Revival playing on the iPod (Keith Richards earlier, it's funny how some songs come to mind when you least expect it isn't it?) and I've got a bit of time to myself, which is good because J.K.'s book is every bit as good as I was hoping that it would be. It's all go isn't it? Well, it certainly will be later.

Sunday 1st January at 2.05 pm, in the hotel lobby

Ah - the wonder of the late check out. Mars spoke to the person behind the desk yesterday who apparently is a regular at the club. That was lucky.
We got back to the hotel not long after 5 am. It had been a long night, but a good one. Opening act Mars Valentines and The Illuminations had warmed the crown up with a set of suitably punky cover versions ('This Perfect Day' sounded particularly strong I thought) and had all looked as though they were having a whale of a time. They went on not long before midnight, and stopped after a couple of songs to open a bottle of champagne (or something very like it) and to toast the start of 2017. And why not? It was Mars's first stage appearance for over two years, and he made a great job of it. And let's face it, anybody who plays a Gibson Firebird has to be alright don't they?
When we were first offered the gig (not that long ago, around October if I remember rightly) I must admit that I for one was a little bemused. Are Ruts D.C. a 'New Year's Eve type of band'? I suppose the answer to that question is something along the lines of 'it depends on where you are on New Year's Eve'. They were certainly the right type of band for The Fulham Greyhound on NYE 1981, and it turned out that we were the right type of band for The Covo Club on NYE 2017. As previously discussed we'd not played a show since November, and while there was no reason that this show shouldn't have been a good one (after all we'd sounded fine in rehearsal) there is often an element of 'ring rustiness' in situations such as these. Thankfully that wasn't the case here, and our 18-song-set-with-a-4-song-encore roared by in no time - always a sign of a good show. Afterwards there was time for a drink (or two) and a chance to talk to some of the audience, many of whom were very emotional about our performance. It's easy to forget how powerful music can be - how it brings like-minded people together, how it can stir up often unexpected emotions and feelings, and how it can mean so much to players and listeners alike. This was definitely one of those nights, a pleasure to part of from start to finish. I often bang on about how lucky I am to be able to play music - I'm not going to do that again here (for once!) but suffice to say that it's good to be reminded of it sometimes... 

Monday 2nd January at 12.26 pm, back in Blighty and at home

So there you have it - a return to blogging after what feels like ages. It's actually only a few weeks, but having written something most weeks for the last 10 (10!) years it's something that's a bigger part of my life than I perhaps realise. I started it to learn to type and to find my way around a computer - despite still being a 'two finger typist' most of the time (thumbs and the odd second finger creep in here and there) I can now get up a reasonable head of steam, and whilst I wouldn't necessarily describe myself as being 'computer literate' I can do more on a computer than I ever could, especially when the damn thing works... I'm still not really sure that anybody reads this stuff, but I'm in too deep to stop now. So I'd better carry on then! Forward!

Oh and I nearly forgot - happy new year y'all!
(Assuming that anybody is reading this…)

'Normal service has resumed...' - or has it?

So - how much do you think that you use a computer?

How much do you think that you need a computer?

Until the events of the past few weeks I probably would have answered along the lines of 'well, not that much really' and 'not at all, after all we did ok before they were invented didn't we?'

Oh dearie dearie me...

It turns out that - rather like most of us I suspect - I use a computer a lot more than I thought that I did. A hell of a lot more than I though that I did. Not all day every day (honest!) but there's always something to do isn't there? Do you order things from places like Amazon? I do. You do as well? That's tricky without a computer, or at the very least one of those new-fangled smartphones. But you kinda need a computer if you've got one of those don't you, for syncing (now there's a word that none of us used until comparatively recently) and all that other stuff... and do you pay your household bills online? Your car insurance? All those other bills and things that we pay for almost without realising it because you're not actually handing over money and therefore it doesn't feel as though you're actually spending anything? Yep, me too. So does that mean that I, or indeed you, 'need' a computer? Can we (gulp!) really not live without one?

Well let's put it this way - I'm typing this somewhat hesitantly on an iPad that I've rather wildly just bought myself as my ageing MacBook has had to go back to the menders after not quite doing what it's supposed to do... after years of being permanently bunged up with several days worth of noisy rock 'n' roll music the hard drive finally gave up the ghost at the start of November - I took it to my friendly neighbourhood computer repair people who have fitted a new hard drive and restored it to it's former glory. And that, as they say, was that. Except of course, it wasn't. Things are never quite that simple are they? Attempts by your humble narrator to 'restore the last backup' (the things that you hear yourself say these days eh?) have sadly proved fruitless so I've had to get a grown-up - or indeed, a young person - to help me. I feel like Fred Flintstone sometimes. 'Twas ever thus. 

In the meantime I've realised that I do indeed 'need' a computer (or at least something very like one) these days, hence the appearance of the iPad. It's been an interesting 3-or-so weeks - I've gigged with Ruts D.C., T.V. Smith, Department S, Big Al Reed and The Blistering Buicks and more, shared stages with the likes of The Damned, The Vapors and Eddie And The Hot Rods, worked a fair bit in Balcony Shirts, seen the David Bowie musical 'Lazarus', held a python and a tarantula in a haunted pub in Devon (oh yes!) and probably lots more besides (there's been updates etc on my Facebook page which you can see here if you're interested in such things) but somehow it's all taken place to a backdrop of me thinking things like 'I wonder if they've fixed my computer yet?'. Strange but true. And I still haven't got the bloody thing back...