'There's only one word for that - magic darts!'

Sad to see that Sid Waddell has died - his darts commentaries were always entertaining and often hilarious, and as these quotes show he (like the always amazing Stuart Hall) had a way with the English language that most of us can only aspire to. It's a shame to see him go.

Sticking with sport the closing ceremony of the London 2012 Olympic Games was a somewhat baffling affair for me, probably best summed up by observing that the mighty Ray Davies sang one song while the always overrated George Michael performed (in the loosest sense of the word) two. Mind you I've never been able to take him seriously since I saw Vic and Bob's parody of him... right at the very end The Who roared through a medley which showed that they've lost none of their firepower, and the realisation that Morgan Nicholls was playing bass took me back to the days when The Price used to play with The Senseless Things, and indeed I used to attend their gigs on a regular basis. He was always a great bass player, and he sounded good here. I wonder if he's in line for the upcoming American tour?

Well whilst I generally hesitate to use words like 'normal' here (for fairly obvious reasons!) I guess it's been a case of back to normal in my post-Rebellion Festival World (incidentally here are some Ruts D.C. and T.V. Smith pics - pretty good eh?) and indeed back to the pubs with The Upper Cut, who played two shows last weekend. It's always a bit strange to follow a big show with a small one (or two) as however much you tell yourself that it's all part and parcel of being a musician it's pretty much impossible not to feel a bit deflated. Overall Friday's show at the Crown and Treaty in Uxbridge wasn't too bad although a couple of songs went wrong leaving your humble narrator in a suitably bad mood. That said we were invited back so we can't have been too bad! On the other hand Saturday's show at the Fox and Duck in Richmond bordered on farce, with the landlady attempting to pay us off and send us home early as the pub was virtually empty 20-or-so minutes before our allotted start time. In the event a few people showed up so she started complaining about bands playing too loud - never a good thing before you've even started playing - which resulted in Roger using hot rods instead of regular drum sticks and Terry the bass and myself playing so quietly that we could hear our unamplified guitar strings. Not good frankly, and I for one won't lose any sleep if we never go back.

This Friday night I managed to double book myself for the first time in ages. I'm still not sure how I managed it, but with The Upper Cut due to play at in Twickenham while Ska Madness were onstage in Southend there clearly had to be a bit of a compromise somewhere... in the event my good friend Pete went West (thanks Pete!) while I went East to The Maritime Room at The Cliffs Pavilion. Matt and myself played our first gig in this format back in February - tonight Russ is on saxophone for a show that could politely be described as 'chaotic' in places (I really must have a good listen to the backing tracks one day; mind you, judging by this performance we all should!) but was definitely good fun, and the audience reaction had all three of us and a visiting CBB bassman Squirrel all agreeing that we should form a ska band. I wonder if we ever will?

And last night - well last night, Saturday night, I wasn't gigging. Back to normal indeed. Bah.

They called it madness

I started this blog 4 years ago this weekend. Did I think then that I'd be publishing slightly disturbing photographs of entertainment industry professionals in someone else's indoor swimming pool? Oddly enough I probably did, if only because they don't have any swimming pools of their own...

The weekend featured 2 outdoor gigs, the first of which was a Chicago Blues Brothers show in the grounds ('garden' doesn't really do it justice) in the grounds of a large dwelling (again 'house' isn't an appropriate term) in Sutton Courtney near Abingdon. I'm not sure whether it was a corporate event or a jolly-up for friends and neighbours - it could even have been a bit of both - but there was a stage and P.A. set-up that would have done justice to a small festival and a marquee big enough to play football in, although to my knowledge nobody did. Pete and Mike were in the hats and glasses (and indeed in the swimming pool with trumpeter Dave) with Ian returning on keyboards after being away filming a live DVD in Denmark with Ray Davies. Squirrel's on bass, Ian's depping for Richard on sax and Bob from the Ali Mac Band was depping with us for the first time. We went for some food in the marquee just in time to catch the first set from a Bee Gees tribute act - I didn't catch their name but one of them looked a bit like Rat Scabies (sadly it wasn't!) and they were loud enough to cause some consternation from the band members sitting nearest to their speakers. By the time we started our first set at around 9.30 it was clear that many audience members were a little, shall we say, 'confused' - well the ones who spent most of our show on stage dancing certainly were... a surprisingly busy Bank Holiday Saturday in Balcony Shirts had seen me graze my right hand when I fell over running up the stairs (admit it, we've all done it!) which although only a small injury had resulted in enough blood to concern at least one customer (and if I'm honest, me!) and which came back to haunt me during my solo in 'Hard To Handle'. I touched the cut against the metal bridge of my guitar and the resulting wince-inducing moment was enough to make me play terribly out of tune for a few seconds. Well, that's my excuse anyway... Bob did very well especially considering that he'd not had much time to learn the songs (he took a DVD of the show on holiday with him - good man!) and the event organisers seemed happy with things which is always nice to see. Oh I broke my right hand thumb nail ('windmilling and being silly' again - will I never learn?!?) which was annoying as I'd been trying to grow it to help with fingerpicking - maybe it's time I got brave and bought a set of fingerpicks?

Sunday's show saw your humble narrator depping with Utter Madness for the first time in just over a year - that was in Belfast, this was in Sunderland. Richard (keyboards) and Tony (vocals) arrived just after 11.30 a.m. - with everything loaded into Richard's estate car and me safely installed in the seat behind the driver ('there's a child lock on your door' said Richard as I sat down) we set off on our epic journey. Around 2 p.m. we stopped at Donnington Services on the M1 where Richard produced a cool bag from which he bought forth seemingly endless amounts of minestrone, sandwiches and other refreshments. What a hero! (The long-suffering Shirley had sent me off with some cheese rolls which I didn't get chance to eat, but I've just had them now and very nice they were too. Thanks Shirl!) A thankfully uneventful journey North ended with us passing The Turbine Business Park just before 4.30, and pulling up in the backstage area in the shadow of rows of identical cars a few minutes later.

We're playing at the Nissan 'family day' which the company puts on for it's workers each year - Ian, Jon, Stuart and Ray (sax, bass, drums and backing vocals / dancing) were already on site as were about 100 or so people in a field that could have held thousands and probably would have had it not been so cold and windy. Mind you I'm saying it was cold and windy - judging by the number of people walking around in t-shirts I was either (a) mistaken or (b) a soft Southern ponce. Either is possible... I got myself some chips and gravy (oh yes!) and a cappuccino (just the drink for a soft Southern ponce eh? And yes, you've guessed it, the froth blew everywhere!) and watched a bit of ZU2 (pronounced 'Zoo Two') who did a very good job, especially considering that they had 50 or so people watching and listening to music that's normally played in venues that hold 50 or so thousand. Still at least the turbines were busy... no sooner had they finished then we were asked to bring our stage time forward an hour to 6 p.m. as people were drifting away from the site. Minor panic ensued on my part when I got locked in Richard's car (remember the child lock?) which I'd sat down in to sort out my stage clothes, although everyone else found it hilarious! Well - the wind blew just as I'd sat down! After the quickest set-up and clothes change in history (I hate rushing don't you?) we were on stage and into 'One Step Beyond' and my hands were so cold that it was difficult to hold my plectrum; by the time we got to a sticky-fingered 'My Girl' I'd warmed up a bit and was playing a bit better although I was aware that I could have done with a bit more revision on the songs. No one else noticed, or if they did they didn't tell me! Our shortened set was well received by the few brave souls still in attendance (you could tell how cold it was getting as the t-shirt wearers had disappeared!) and we encored with 'Our House' to cheery applause.

After the quickest get-out ever (I didn't bother getting changed as I hadn't been sweating!) we left the site just before our allotted stage time - strange but true! - and after a journey enlivened by various word games (rock'n'roll eh?) I walked back in through the front door exactly 12 hours (9-and-a-bit of which had been spent travelling) after I'd left. As I say, strange but true, and a good story to start my 5th year of blogging with. Stay tuned for further distractions, as they say...

The National Trust disco

Sorry about all that ranting last time - it was the heat I tell you, the heat... but you can click here for the last word (in these hallowed pages at least) on England's calamitous World Cup campaign courtesy of the excellent Monkey Picks blog. I couldn't have put it better myself, as they say...

Funnily enough my phone came back on a couple of hours after I finished the afore-mentioned cyber-rant; I'm not sure it's working properly (a NETWORK LOST message keeps appearing which is a bit of a worry) but at least I could see if Macca or E.C. had left me a message. They hadn't. Oh well - maybe next time?

Meanwhile back in the land of the gigging The CBB roadshow rolled in to Surrey on Friday for an outdoor show at Polesden Lacey. Bev's in for Richard on sax, and with Ian away with Ray Davies Chris is on keyboards; the voice on the entryphone on the outskirts of the property sounds suspiciously like Stephen Hawking, and when the long-suffering Shirley and myself arrived at the stage ('just drive up to it' said Pete - so we did!) everything was set up and ready for soundchecking. Quite how we managed to attempt versions of 'All Right Now' (I made a right mess of the solo!) and 'Brown Sugar' with Pete on bass (Squirrel was due along later) and Matt on drums is a bit beyond me (thinking about it how '2-4-6-8 Motorway' made an appearance is a bit of a mystery too) but we eventually got back to the script with 'Sweet Home Chicago'. It sounded good to me but since I've still got the hearing problems that I mentioned last time I'm probably not the best person to judge things - monitor problems for Tracy and Pete (both on backing vocals) persisted all the way through the gig so sadly it wasn't all good news. Backstage before the gig Matt got a bit confused as to whether he is a member of The National Trust or The National Front (definitely the former!) and some very helpful staff bought in copious amounts of sandwichs and organic lager - excellent! The show itself was a bit of an odd one - we played well but it all seemed a bit, for want of a better word, 'muted' although the fact that there was a large dip in the ground (which would have made a good mosh pit although the only people I saw in it all night were bored-looking security men) between us and the audience could well have contributed to this. Not a bad show by any means but there was a bit of an odd feeling at the end, if you know what I mean.

One of the people who'd been trying to contact me in the earlier part of the week (actually he was pretty much the only person trying to contact me, but obviously I'm not going to admit that here) was Pete Kerr, guitarist with local heroes The Cane Toads and all round good bloke. He'd had a call from Caithriona at The Half Moon in Harrow who needed a band for the coming Saturday evening, and, confirming his 'all round good bloke' status, Pete suggested The Upper Cut (and yes, we're definitely called that now!) After a quick (landline) ring-round everyone - Terry on vocals, Terry on bass and Roger on drums - confirmed their availability, and the gig was on. We all turned up at the venue in the midst of the Spain vs. Paraguay game (everyone seemed to be missing penalties in the bit that I saw!) and attempted to set up as unobtrusively as possible. Terry the bass was on fine if rather surreal form - his opening comment of 'I think I've had flu all week - well I haven't had all the symptoms but it did take me 4 hours to put my socks on' will stay with me for quite some time... since Pete depped for me at a recent show we invited him along to join us for a few songs, and he ended up doing 5 or 6 with us all of which sounded good to my admittedly still-ailing ears. There was the inevitable exodus at the end of the game but those who were there saw the clock above the stage fall off the wall and nearly land on Terry the singer's head just a few moments after Caithriona had asked us to turn down a bit as they'd recently had complaints about volume levels from the neighbours. We weren't that loud! Terry the bass uttered the immortal words 'I was playing all the right notes but not necessarily in the right order' at the end of 'Layla' (he was right, he was!) and there were a few, shall we say, unusual arrangements here and there but overall we were pretty good even though I say so myself, and we've been asked to play there again next month (on Friday 13th!) so we must have done something right. It's good when that happens - I'll be cheering up if I'm not careful...

Barnet fair

I don't know about you but I used to really like football. As a lifelong fan of the (once) mighty Reds I'm obviously less keen these days (!) but even without their hapless descent into near self-parody I think I'd have lost interest anyway since most major games these days look to me like a bunch of bored millionaires filling in time before making another attempt at getting off with one of their teammate's wives.

Cynical? Me? Imagine that...

On the other hand from a Balcony Shirts point of view I'm bound to say that I'm completely wrong with the above analysis; we should all be supporting England in their attempt to bring The World Cup back to it's rightful home, and of course be wearing an appropriate t-shirt whilst doing so. You know it makes sense!

The opening night of the tournament (Friday in case you're not following it) saw The 4 Faces visit the excellently named After Office Hours in Barnet. Roger (drums) and myself arrived to find Terry and Terry (bass and vocals) on hand to help us carry our gear in, a fortuitous development as we could only get in the back way which was across a yard and up some rather imposing looking iron steps. The Uruguay vs. France match was on the big screen which was on the stage - so no setting up until the end of the game then. It didn't look a very likely venue for us but with the aid of a stag party and some very interesting dancing from some young ladies present it turned out to be a good night. I tried the FMT Telecaster again which coped well with the rockier material as well as the soul stuff (it's got very good pick-ups along with a coil tapping switch) so it definitely looks like Andy's made a sale... oh and Terry the singer suggested that we change the name of the band again; Terry the bass said he'd just seen a shop opposite called The Upper Cut (presumably it's a hairdressers?!?) and that'd be a good name for us, not least as it was a club in London back in the 1960's. Everyone seemed to approve although I for one am not sure if we're now called that or not. Let's see what happens at the next gig.

Saturday it was back up to The Barnham Broom Hotel for what is becoming an annual event for us, The Wishes Ball (organised by trumpeter Dave and his wife Lyn among others) in aid of GOSH and EACH. Ian's back on keyboards (he's been away gigging with Ray Davies) and Ian's on sax in place of Richard; Pete and Mike are running the charity auction as well as fronting the band - originally to be a Blues Brothers show it became a Stacks Of Soul gig somewhere along the way, and very good it was too, with plenty of dancefloor action and even a few gatecrashers who were removed by Dave and Lyn. With the England vs. U.S.A. match on in the nearby sports bar Lyn issued a stern warning that anyone caught sneaking out to watch the match would be fined - Mike and Ian both returned from the bar to find pieces of paper telling them how much they owed the charity on their place mats. Perhaps they should have just watched it on their phones like everybody else did!

A couple of years or so ago I did a gig in what might well be one of the more unusual locations of my (ahem) career - the front window of Horsepower Hairdressing in Uxbridge. Andy and myself made a return appearance there on Sunday afternoon at The Loose Goose, a gathering organised by Horsepower supremo Adam which attracted a bewildering number of like-minded souls, many of which arrived on motorbikes or in hod rods and who provided Uxbridge with one of the most extraordinary gatherings that the High Street has ever seen. As we played through a mixture of old blues numbers and songs from The Flying Squad's repertoire tattooed ladies mingled with impressively bearded bikers and an atmosphere of cheery bonhomie prevailed. Arch Flying Squad fan Keith arrived just as we were joined by Steve (a mate of Adam's) on cajon for 'Down At The Doctors' - when we'd finished that he fetched a double bass from his van (!) which he proved to be equally adept at. We had a break to watch the penny farthing time trials (I'm not making this up, honest) and when we finished playing around 5 p.m. both Andy and myself agreed that it had been one of the most enjoyable afternoon's that we'd had in ages - which was just as well as I'd missed some of Shirley's birthday barbecue to play at it. Sorry Shirl! That's why I call her 'long-suffering'...

Deal or no deal?

Well there we are then - Britain has it's first hung parliament since the dark days of the 1970's. Personally I will never - never! - understand how a working class person can vote for The Conservative Party, since it seems to me that everything about them is designed to ensure that there's a system in place to keep us proles in the gutter where they think we belong - but it seems that millions got fooled again. And now of course the wheeling and dealing begins, as the the 3 main political parties disappear into a cloud of compromise in an increasingly desperate attempt to get as much power as possible at whatever cost to the few principles that they've still got left, after a general election that saw more deception and doublespeak than ever before.

It's not good really is it?

Friday night's gig wasn't too good either; The Bell in Ruislip has I'm told worked hard to lose it's reputation as being, shall we say, 'less than friendly' but I fear it's failed - there was trouble there recently and the atmosphere wasn't too genial the other night either as Youngblood (yeah I know we were called The 4 Faces last time but Mick the drummer was back for this one as he got us the gig so I'll use our old name here - keep up at the back there!) stumbled through 2 sets in front of ex-CBB'er Mario, a few laddish lads and the landlord's dog. As I stepped off the stage '5.15' by The 'Orrible 'Oo' came on the juke box - 'why should I care?' indeed, it could have been worse (just!) so maybe I should stop moaning and, as somebody once put it, shut up and play the guitar? There we are, I've shut up.

Click here for footage of another guitarist who should cheer up!

Surreal as it may sound there was at least one point in the last couple of weeks when it looked as though your humble narrator could have found himself doing a one-off gig in South Korea on Saturday night; as with so many of these thing it didn't come to pass which is a bit of a shame on several levels, not least as it deprives me of the chance to call this blog entry 'Korea Opportunities' or 'Seoul Man'... that said it would had to have gone quite a long way to have beaten The Chicago Blues Brothers show at The Grosvenor House Hotel in the surrealness stakes, as we were on with Stavros Flatley and the band of The Royal Scots Guards. Actually thinking about it now about the only thing that could have made it more surreal was if they'd appeared on stage together - sadly this didn't happen but I guess there's always next time?
Now I don't know about you but I don't follow all those T.V. reality/talent shows (you know the ones...) and therefore hadn't encountered Stavros Flatley before, but the descriptions that I was given beforehand were extraordinary, mostly along the lines of 'a Greek bloke and his son jump about and do mad Irish dancing'. Sounds just what I'm looking for... as I arrived around 6 p.m. after a busy day in the shop everything seemed to be more-or-less ready for action, with my old Laney combo already set-up (I'd came in on the Tube with just my guitar and stage clothes, Pete keeps my spare amp for situations such as these) and everyone else soundchecked and ready to go. It's the Mears Group May Ball and we're playing in (you've guessed it!) The Ballroom; we've got The Court Suite to use as a dressing room and it's a 'nearly-the-A-team' gig with Chris in for Ian on keyboards as he's away gigging with Ray Davies, with Phil's on the P.A. with Big Tel and Dave D.J.-ing. Stavros and son arrive just as the guards are readying themselves for action, the atmosphere is genial as Stavros signs autographs for all and sundry; I've never asked anyone for an autograph in my life and wasn't going to here until it occurred to me that it might be fun to get one for the shop - Stavros obliged and it's on our Facebook page even as we speak! After the guards band had been on (they did more-or-less what you think they'd do i.e. march about playing military music, an oddly incongruous site on a night such as this) it was time for 3 minutes of, well, a Greek bloke and his son jumping about and doing mad Irish dancing - a near riot ensued where I was watching with people clamouring for a better view and much merriment all round. Stavros took the mic for a few minutes chat, he seemed to be a very nice chap when I spoke to him and came over as such here, appearing almost bemused by the level of success that he and his son has attained. 'We only went on the show for a laugh' said he - whatever the merits or otherwise of what they do they certainly put a smile on a few people's faces on this particular night, which is pretty hard to criticise if you think about it... and we didn't do too badly either, with plenty of dancefloor action during our epic 2 hour set, with an hour or so from Big Tel and Dave bringing a highly successful evening to a close. It's strange - corporate events such as this are not always much fun from a band point of view as you're quite often a secondary consideration but this one was something of an exception, and all the better for it. But it did get a bit odd here and there - maybe that's why I liked it?

I liked Sunday's gig too, although this one also gets stamped 'odd' but for different reasons. For a start it was in Battersea; nothing too odd with that as such but the venue is a Gypsy jazz themed bar called (wait for it!) Le QuecumBar. (Yeah!) It's run by Silvia who describes it as 'the most expensive hobby that I've ever had'; with it's walls adorned with photos of everybody from Django Reinhardt to, er, Hank Marvin (a serious fan of the genre who apparently even turns up at their jam nights and is hoping to put out a gypsy jazz album one day) it's an unlikely venue for The CBB's even if we are using a previously untried format of live guitar and saxophone over backing tracks. Matt 'n'Mike are Jake 'n' Elwood, local lad Ian is on sax (you can see his house from the venue!) and during our soundcheck Ian and myself deciding to play seated on the stage with the BB's on the floor in front of us - I told you it was an odd gig. Mind you it's not as odd as (a) being asked if I know how to fit a dimmer switch on the stage lights and (b) actually fitting it. I didn't know I knew how!
The gig goes well especially considering that Ian and myself are unfamiliar with most of the backing tracks even to the extent of not knowing what key some of the songs are in; there's the odd mad moment (I hadn't heard 'Love Man' for a while!) but we get through it all reasonably unscathed with the BB's in fine form. We might even appear in the same unlikely format again one day. Odder and odder.

Oo-er - Gordon Brown has just resigned. Anarchy anyone?

Friends reunited

2 good gigs from the ever-improving Youngblood this weekend- Friday at The Bell in Ruislip Gardens and Saturday at The Misty Moon in Bethnal Green. The Bell is a local gig for me and always had a bad reputation for violence 'though these days this thankfully seems to be a thing of the past. Terry (vocals) and Mick (drums) played there several times when they were in The Chevrons and they certainly seemed to have something of a following there which contributed to a rather boisterous evening which included some very well developed ladies showing off their dancing skills (I'll leave you to think about that one for a minute shall I?) and an extremely drunken lady telling us her life story in an attempt to get us to play 'Valerie'. We didn't know it (although we now know her life story!) so we didn't play it... The Misty Moon show was the better band performance but to a smaller audience (it's always that way round!) 'though it did include the 'very-drunk-man-in-a-bright-red-jacket-who-thinks-he-can-sing' (haven't had one of them for a while!) whose rendition of 'Ain't No Sunshine' had to be heard to be believed; we also had audience requests of 'The First Cut Is The Deepest' and 'All Shook Up', both of which we gamely tackled 'though I'm not sure we did them justice. Oh and Terry the bassman provided on of the evening's best moments by answering Mick's observation that his car needed washing with the brilliantly mad comment 'I never wash my car- so it never needs washing.' Hard to argue with that one don't you think...

On the other hand Thursday saw the next installment of the ongoing saga that is 'The Chicago Blues Brothers go to Switzerland', this time to play at The Durachpark in Schaffhausen at a corporate event for Unilever who have an office in town (although I remember Lever Brothers at Port Sunlight when I was a lad.) With Marc off in panto ('oh no he isn't' etc) and Ian still away with Ray Davies we had Chris depping once again on keyboards and my old mate Paul on drums. I first met Paul back in the mid-'90's, and got back in touch with him after I saw his unscheduled appearance with Spinal Tap earlier this year; when it became clear that we were going to need a drummer for this show it seemed a good idea to put him up for the job, and to this end we met up a couple of weeks ago to give him a DVD of our Hayes gig from a year or so ago (a bit risky since the show's changed a bit since then but it was the only one I had!) so that he could learn our material. (Rehearsals? Pah!) The long-suffering Shirley dropped us off at Heathrow at 7.15 a.m. (why does it always have to be so early?!?) where we checked in (I don't remember getting my return ticket at outbound check-in before?) then went through security to meet the rest of the troops in the departure lounge. A relatively uneventful flight was enlivened no end by us being able to watch take off and landing on the in flight televisions via a camera at the front of the aircraft. I'd not seen this before although I'm told it's quite commonplace these days- what will they think of next eh? The take off was... well, mad is a good word for it I think- you really get a feeling of the speed the aircraft reaches just before the horizon abruptly disappears from view, And the landing was extraordinary- as we descended through the clouds towards Zurich Airport a small reddish light appeared in the centre of the otherwise grey screen (so grey that I wasn't sure if it was switched on or not!) which gradually metamorphosed into the runway lights (Squirrel- 'well you wouldn't miss those would you?') They got larger and larger before they eventually filled the screen, an oddly comforting sight as we touched the ground. Sadly the return take off and landing went, for want of a better term, unbroadcast which was a shame since I'd liked to have seen the approach to Heathrow although since it was foggy we probably wouldn't have seen anything anyway. Oh well- there's always next time.

Once on the ground Squirrel and myself had a problem locating our guitars- having walked around for ages trying to find the outsize baggage section we eventually spotted them sitting next to belt 22 where the rest of the baggage from the flight had emerged. With everything (and indeed everybody) in one piece we met Marcel the driver and loaded everything into the minibus for the journey to the venue. Marcel had made up a CD to play on the journey as he thought we might like it- I'd just recognised 'Lawdy Mama' by Cream when half the band (possibly rather ungratefully) called for it to be turned off. The 40-odd minute journey passed in a bit of a daze from your humble narrator's point of view (the early start was beginning to catch up with me!) and we arrived at the venue to be met by Ronnie the promoter and CBB supremo Pete who had flown out the previous day to get everything sorted out for the show. The stage had a large image of Al Capone suspended behind the drums (why?!?) and petrol pumps and speed limit signs everywhere- soundcheck showed that Paul had certainly got the hang of the 'Midnight Medley' (4 songs for price of 1!) and 'River Deep, Mountain High', and with everything sounding good (including the excellent Fender Hot Rod Deville provided for me to play through) we went to the dressing room for some takeaway pizza (excellent!) and to draw up a plan for the rest of the day. Since we weren't needed at the gig until 8.30 we went to our hotel to check in (I'm sharing room 121 with Paul) and to catch up on some much needed sleep before all meeting at 6 p.m. for some food.

When we returned to the venue things were clearly in full swing, with an act that I think were called Beatz on stage- they're similar in concept to the 'Stomp' theatre show in that they hit lots of things very loudly, in this case to the bemusement of much of the audience, many of whom were dressed in 1930's style clothing (I'm not sure where the Blues Brothers fit into that but at least the Al Capone picture makes a bit more sense!) By the time we went on at 10.15 the free cocktails were clearly doing their job judging by the audience reaction which was a bit muted at first but seemed to get going as our set went on. Paul did a fine job- he's very self-critical but it's a hard show to walk into with no rehearsal and all agreed that he did a fine job. A quick encore of 'Jailhouse Rock' and 15 minutes after leaving the stage we were already on our way back to our hotel, one of the quickest post-gig getaways that I've ever been part of. Al Capone would have been proud of us!

Back at the hotel Paul and myself decide that even though it's late and it's been a long day there's still time for a drink (there's always time for a drink, or if there isn't there should be!) and so make our way to the downstairs bar which thankfully is still open. We reflected on our first show together for over 10 years, and Paul observed that his last live show was at Wembley Arena (the Spinal Tap gig) with the one before it at The Nag's Head in High Wycombe; we laughed at the fact that my next one was to be at a small pub in Ruislip less that 24 hours after the one that we'd just played and what a strange set of contrasts this job often throws out. Paul said how he doesn't get to play live anywhere near as much as he'd like (he teaches drums privately and in schools) and I reminded myself how lucky I am to be able to play as often as I do- although I didn't feel quite so lucky as I got up at 5 a.m. for the flight home...

From 'W(h)icker's World' to 'The Gong Show'

I was sad to hear of the death of the great actor Edward Woodward- I remember him in 'Callan' when I was a lad, and he played the lead role in 'Breaker Morant' which is one of my all-time favourite films 'though I guess he'll always be best remembered for his extraordinary performance in 'The Wicker Man', not least because of that scene with Britt Ekland...

Time to catch up on the last few days in mad-guitar-land:-

It was a funny old night last night, when I wended my weary way across to Northwood Hills for the launch night of Stompbox, a new shop specialising in guitar effects pedals although from what I can gather they're hoping to move more into selling instruments in the new year. (Didn't I used to work in a shop that did that? Hmm...) The event actually took place a few doors down from the shop in Woody's Bar- I was given a goodie bag as I arrived which momentarily distracted me from the appalling version of 'Killing Floor' emanating from the stage. Was it really necessary to have a bass solo? And was that really my old mate Paul on drums? Oh dear... (incidentally if you're interested you can find a really good version of 'Killing Floor' here, and another one here; it's a pity these idiots hadn't heard them as they might have put them off trying to play the song, or if we'd been really lucky, any songs...) Both the guitarist and bassist kept telling us which instruments they were using to get their 'great sound' (their description, not mine) with- at least we all know what to avoid buying now. Their unrehearsed 'performance' featured more overplaying than pretty much any show I've ever seen (never play one note where ten will do eh lads?) and did nothing to disguise their contempt for the music (as though it was all beneath them if you know what I mean) as they proved time and time again that sarcasm is indeed the lowest form of wit- or maybe they weren't being sarcastic enough? At the start of the last song ('Alright Now' in case you were wondering) the bass player made a 'joke' about 'not having much to do in this one' (there's no bass in the verses) and then came in with a badly played slap bass line before his instrument went wrong- like I say, at least we now know which ones not to buy.

The main band of the evening were The Tin Spirits who featured the excellent Dave Gregory of XTC on guitar. I'm a big XTC fan, and after the cretins that preceded them they sounded all but magnificent with 'The Mayor Of Simpleton' sounding every bit as good as I remember it. I was hoping for more from Swindon's finest but after they followed a Genesis song with a Yes song we (Stuart the guitar repair man, Pete from The Cane Toads et al) decided that we'd had enough and opted for a visit to The Half Moon in Harrow where Pete thought there might be a trad jazz band playing- sure enough The Bearcat Brawlers were on after the football although their drummer had got fed up with waiting and gone home. Pete introduced me to Al the cornet player who's over 80 years old- it turned out he might well have been one of the youngest members- excellent! Oh and he also introduced me to my new friend Katrina who books the bands there- she's from Dublin, her surname's Hegarty (only one 'g'- I told her my lot are greedy) and she'd like to book The Flying Squad and Youngblood sometime soon. A funny old night as I say...

Time for some live music of a rather higher quality; if you've seen the popular television programme 'True Blood' then you've no doubt heard the theme music but if not, check out 'Bad Things' by Jace Everett- it's a brilliantly haunting piece of country rock that should be better known in it's own right. The man himself (aided and abetted by the excellent Dan Cohen on occasionally-malfunctioning guitar) played a low-key show at The Water Rats in King's Cross on Tuesday evening and very good he was too; with a splendidly grim line in between song comments ('this is not an image, it's a personality disorder') and a voice that reminded me of Johnny Cash one minute and Mick Jagger the next (strange but true!) he gave a great performance that made me resolve to find out more about him and make sure that I catch a full band performance if they come over here. The support act Honey Ryder were worth a look too, with two acoustic guitars combining to great effect and a girl singer that was so good looking that I almost didn't notice how obvious some of the lyrics were. And I saw my old mate Pete Hobbs for the first time in ages- he now has long grey hair and a beard that gets him called Santa at Christmas and Gandalf the rest of the time. Excellent!

Sunday and Monday were spent in Merseyside as the long-suffering Shirley and myself took my Dad up to visit our family. Shirley wanted to go on The Mersey Ferry and I hadn't been on it this century (!) so much of Monday was spent over in Liverpool alternately marvelling at the new architecture and (in my Dad's case at least) ranting about how inappropriate they looked next to the older buildings. I did the 'Beatle-tourist' bit and went to Mathew Street for the first time since the 'new' Cavern Club opened (my Auntie Joyce assures me that it's 'exactly the same' as the old one, and she should know) and Shirl set her sights on a return visit to the recently-opened Liverpool One shopping centre. And it was good to see some of the family again for the first time since my cousin Gary's funeral 'though it was strange to see his brother Steve without him by his side as they were almost inseparable, like 'proper' brothers if you know what I mean. My Auntie May (his mum) showed us the last picture taken of him just a few weeks before his death, he was smiling- but then again, he usually was. And my Auntie Emma is 83 and fitter than all of us! How does she do that?!?

Two very different gigs on Friday and Saturday, the first of which saw The Chicago Blues Brothers return to what's becoming a regular haunt for us, The Grove Theatre in Dunstable. Chris is on keyboards as Ian's away in the U.S.A. with Ray Davies but other than that it's an A-Team gig; monitor problems plagued the soundcheck and indeed the first half of the show- as we started 'Peter Gunn' the keyboards were literally deafening in Squirrel's monitor (well, that's what they were from my point of view, they must have been all but unbearable where he was standing) and when he and Tracy sang in 'Everybody Needs Somebody To Love' their voices were so loud in my monitor that they nearly knocked me over. It all seemed ok by the second set although I can't decide whether that's because the levels were adjusted or if we just got used to it... that said the evening went very well 'though we were a little loose in places (I guess we've not been playing together enough lately sadly) and the audience reaction was enough to convince even the most sceptical band member (i.e. me!) that it had been a good gig.

The next night saw a very different and indeed unexpected show. East and myself were in The Load of Hay on Thursday evening (well- we had to drop off some posters for the upcoming Kris Dollimore gig; that's our excuse anyway! And we forgot them so we'll have to go down there this week too! Hurrah!) when Grant the landlord came over to say that the act that should have been playing on Saturday had lost their voice and did I have any ideas for a replacement? Leaving aside the obvious 'how did they tell you?' gags (sorry!) I had a bit of a think about it before sending Terry the Youngblood singer a text message... so it was then that while everyone else was watching 'The X Factor' in the other bar myself and himself found ourselves setting up a P.A. system and scribbling song titles on a piece of paper trying to come up with 2 45 minute sets to be started less than an hour later. He rather gingerly produced a harmonica- 'I Just Wanna Make Love To You' and 'Baby What You Want Me To Do' were added to the list immediately. I rather wildly suggested 'Stay With Me' as 'about the least likely song to be performed on just an acoustic guitar' (it went straight on the list as did 'Alright Now' for the same reason) and as we began with '(Sittin' On) The Dock Of The Bay' I don't mind admitting that I was wondering if we'd bitten off a bit more than we could chew but all things considered it went very well- we even got a request for 'anything by Gong' from a particularly enthusiastic (if rather misguided) chap who spent half of our first set bellowing things like 'you've gotta come down here, they sound like they should be playing Wembley' into his mobile phone and most of the second set asking for Led Zeppelin songs. Terry sang excellently and Shirley got him back to West Ruislip station in time for his last train home- definitely the mark of a good gig don't you think?